Wednesday, October 13, 2010

God loves you whether you're dating or not, right?

QuestionGod loves you whether you're dating or not, right?

Answer I think you know already that Gods love is unconditional. This means that no matter what, he loves you. Even if you're Hitler- which I hope you're not.

Dating is also not a sin, as far as I know. I should tell you that I generelly advise against it for teenagers... dating is supposed to prepare you for marriage. But when you're a teenager, more likely than not, the relationship will end in a breakup. So, something that is supposed to train you for life long commitment instead trains you for divorce, because dating couples think that as long as they are excited about each other, they should stay together, but if the novelty wears off, or they start getting annoyed with each other, or one of them gets excited about someone else.... then they should break up. Alot of people get divorces for these same stupid reasons.

That said, if you are in a relationship, use it ot train you how to love. Just don't think of it in selfish terms!

But alot of teens also feel that their value is somehow hinged in how attractive they are to the opposite sex. So if they don't or have never had a boyfriend or girlfriend.... they think they are less attractive, thus less lovable, less valuable, etc. That is a lie! You should know that men actually find women more attractive if they date less. For example, Catherine never dated anyone before dating me. But she is very beautiful- and in her case, it was not for lack of opportunity. The fact that she said 'no' to other guys spoke to her fine quality in my mind!

But your value should never be hinged in some external thing. People take their identity in all kinds of things- popularity, sports, intelligence, faith, wealth, jobs, etc. You should try to take your identity in Christ, which means this....

If you wonder how good you are, or how beautiful, or any number of like questions, ask Christ. If you don't hear Him answer, try to guess which answer He would give. Jesus is truth, so He cannot lie. The fact that we can guess what He would say indicates that we actually already know the truth- but people and our culture lie to us so much, and we repeat those lies to ourselves so much, that sometimes the truth gets drowned out by lies. Choose to speak and believe the truth!

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